Smear

by Jolyn Low

I dreamnt of applying makeup and smearing it all over.

Setting off tomorrow for Hanoi. Its going to be my last trip before school begins I suppose. Unless I manage another short getaway. I feel extremely unprepared this time, barely looking up on what I want to do and knowing little to nothing about the country. The beauty of being in a foreign land (for me) is partially the freedom. Away from home, experiencing, learning, and enjoying.

Printed out a shitload of documents for the scholarship. My last chance at something that is really important to me. I despise the idea of taking up a loan and being in debt. Living off parents is up there on a list of things I don’t want to do as well. Too bad money doesn’t grow on trees and there ain’t no sugar daddy to pay these bills. I’ll pull through. Eventually. Though there is definitely a need for dependence on them for the next few years.

Was helping my mom vet through some documents. I feel so useful for once doing something to help me parents instead of it being the other way around.

Finally made my decision. I don’t know how it’s going to turn out, but I’m going to give it my best shot. To be honest, I do find learning and studying enjoyable. The mental stimulation is something that I fancy and take pride in. Knowledge makes me so thirsty for more. There isn’t a end to this. I just hope that I find joy in the subjects that I’m studying. The development of my social and presentation skills can’t hurt either. I’ve always found it frustrating to “limit” myself to one specialisation. This makes me so, so glad to have the flexibility to pursue two different yet cohesive subjects. It’s the educational experience that counts and I think I’ve chosen the school that would best help me achieve what I desire. There’s this certain thrill that goes along with the fact that its my mom’s alma mater too.

I’m losing track of time. Have to reach the airport in the early morning so I was asking my dad about the arrangement since I thought my younger sister had school. Totally forgot that its the June holidays. Hopefully there won’t be too many kids on the cruise. Am planning to laze about reading the Game of Thrones and the Narnia series as well. I recall reading the Horse and his Boy 10 years ago. I wonder how it’ll change this time round.

Just finished a Clash of Kings tonight and I can’t wait to start on the next book. Might consider watching season 2 but I’m quite tempted to go back to review season 1 as well. Well, I’ve all the time (other than working, driving, and studying) to do so. My time is running short and I dread the idea of not enjoying it before school starts. At the very least, during this long break I’ve done a few noteworthy, useful things. Completed a teaching internship and decided not to pursue that path, passed my piano grade 8 (damn great achievement because I suck so badly), and have exposed myself to so many different things through interviews, tests and jobs, learning so much more about myself and about how things work in the process. *pats back*

To 6 days of enjoyment and relaxation! Cheers.

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