Disappointment

by Jolyn Low

This might just be pms – the time of the month when I’m extra sensitive and irrational over the slightest things. I absolutely hate “wasting money” in the sense of not getting what I think its worth. And today was just a damn horrible day with regards to that.

I was so exhausted that I crashed at home for about an hour. Had lunch (which I didn’t particularly enjoy) before heading off. Just my luck, I’m on a stubborn sonofabitch that annoys the fuck out of me, its 32 degrees out and it’s stifling in the arena. I have no idea why I can survive days of training and riding but not do the same for a private lesson. Anyway, I ended up doing basically nothing, learning nothing and ended up puking my fucking guts out afterwards and almost blacking out. What the fuck is wrong with me?

So I basically wasted $150 for no fucking reason o my god Jolyn you winner you fucking rich bastard.

I’ve made so many bad decisions and mistakes this year it’s a fucking joke. My body is a joke. My life is a joke.

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