by Jolyn Low

I was terribly bored and had a full tank of petrol so my friends and I decided to explore king’s park. I would have spent all day exploring, really, given the chance. Being in nature/ away from the bustle of the city and its people is so calming I don’t feel like I ever get enough. It makes me think that all I need in life is a car to take me places, money for petrol and a companion to bounce ideas off of.

Other current thoughts I’ve had in the past days were of finishing activity logs and farm prac portfolios, applying for stuff, travelling and eating food in Singapore. I’d watched numerous videos made by Singaporean youtubers because I missed home and my mind was rotting from silly shows and the terrible nothingness that consumes it during holidays. I kind of miss having uni because at least then I feel like I’m somehow progressing towards an end. Taking a solo trip somewhere during summer sounds like a good idea at the moment. It makes me feel in control of my life when I really feel out of sorts and lost most of the time. I also just want a break from Perth. I’m so sick and tired of living here it’s not even funny anymore. I’ll explore it more when I actually need to be stuck here in my later years with its insane schedule of trimesters and pracs.

I really just can’t wait for graduation now. 5 years feels so long and drawn out. I’m so tired now, how am I going to get through 3.5 years more and 9 more rounds of information overloads and exams when I feel insufficient and incredibly not good enough?

If I started this journey with a huge flame, I’m currently a tiny little one like those that light tea lights. Small and struggling, but still there.